We live in a spiritual
system of sorts; each relationship affects the other. A person achieves spiritual
growth and wholeness through relationships; each relationship affecting another.
Growth and action in one area will very likely stimulate growth in another
area. Likewise inactivity or apathy in one will probably constrict growth
in others. Nothing we do is done in isolation. It does have an effect on other
areas of our lives whether we know it or not.
In the alcoholic's
world, relationships are at best "dysfunctional." Alcoholics are
persons with sizable life problems. Their lives are unpredictable and unstable.
Active alcoholics are not clearly aware of what they are doing and how it
affects others. There is a general tendency towards self-deception, and often
this disease has been called a disease of "delusion." At one time
professionals said that alcoholics were "sincerely deluded" -- that
they really believed that what they were doing was alright and everything
was under control. Others, however, could see the real picture of the chronic
and destructive nature of the disease of alcoholism. Whenever alcoholics drink,
they have given up the freedom of choice.
Blocks
to spiritual growth
Spirituality sits
at the heart around which all other aspects of our lives center. All other
values revolve around a spiritual manner of living. Spirituality transcends
the physical and material world.
Alcoholism encircles
and controls an individual and often leads to a lifestyle of self-centeredness
and rationalizations resulting in a lonely and painful life. A false pride
sets in that prevents a recognition of the fact that they are powerless over
alcohol, that their life is dominated by alcohol. A "non-spiritual"
lifestyle develops, one that is characterized by a movement away from what
is moral and ethical. It robs a person's ability and the capacity for values
and beliefs. Because the alcoholic is not able to control what is going on
around him or her, fear, worry, and anxiety set in; and hope slowly but surely
dwindles.
Healthful and productive
ways of thinking are replaced by fear, anger, resentment, dishonest thinking,
shame, and guilt. Self-worth is greatly replaced by suspicion and fear. The
belief that there is meaning and purpose to life becomes a mere daydream.
A corollary seems
to exist that the more a person is feeling shameful and guilty, the more difficulty
it is to approach God because of what has happened. Shame has to do with what
kind of person the alcoholic has become. Shame is a difficult area to deal
with because of its deep roots. Reconciliation is much needed.
The alcoholic's
journey is much like the prodigal son's. While the alcoholic may think he
or she is going it alone, others -- family, spouse, children, and friends
-- are also affected and undergoing a parallel experience.
Spiritual
growth
"Spiritual
growth is the key to all human growth," says Dr. Howard Clinebell, a
noted professor of pastoral psychology and counseling. This is not a new concept,
but it needs to be said again and again. John Macquarrie, a noted theologian,
says that "the whole creation is the domain of the spirit." Our
Christian spirituality would be virtually empty without Jesus Christ at the
head. It would be like a sail luffing haphazardly in the wind as if it were
lost and looking for some direction.
The alcoholic,
for whatever reason, has become powerless over alcohol, yet tries ever so
hard to keep it under control, not wanting to admit that he or she is truly
powerless over its grip. The Alcoholic's Anonymous Program, which began in
the 1930s, understood that first there must be an admission of powerlessness
over the drug. This is Step One and the second step is that a "power
greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity" (see Appendix for
the 12 Steps and 12 Traditions of AA). It was very clear to the early founders
of AA that there was a way that worked, and it meant having a power greater
than ourselves. The philosophy of Alcoholic's Anonymous and the 12 Suggested
Steps of AA are deeply spiritual and have helped thousands upon thousands
into a recovery program. The 12 Steps are equally important to family members
and other concerned persons. The spiritual dimension is as important to them
as it is to the alcoholic. They, too, are in need of healing.
While the 12-Step
Program is not a religious program, it is a program that draws from Judeo-Christian
teaching. Individuals are left to choose and decide who their God is. Often
people involved in the 12-Step Program refer to God or a greater power as
their Higher Power or H.P. It is meant with the deepest of respect.
The Twelve
Steps and Relationships
Integration of
the 12 Steps is a "process." It is "both/and" rather than
"either/or." Each aspect of the 12 Steps overlaps other steps. Each
day is a new learning, and the familiar jargon in AA circles clearly identifies
that it is "One day at a time." Slogans like, "Easy does it,"
"Let go, Let God," "Turn it over," "Keep it simple"
and others point to a positive philosophy of living. It is a philosophy that
involves others. It is not something to be done alone. Listed below are what
steps relate to which relational aspects.
Steps related to
God: 2,3,5,6,7,11 (Notice 6 of the 12 Steps use the word God.)
Steps related to others: 5,8,9,12
Steps related to self: 1,4,5,10
All of the 12 steps
are either directly or indirectly related to the world we live in, our environment,
the community we live in.
The need for a
moral inventory as found in Step 4 and the expressed need of Step 5 "Admitted
to God, to ourselves and to another human being, the exact nature of our wrongs,"
are foundation steps in the recovering process. Notice that Step 5 includes
three very clear relationships. These steps are certainly similar to the steps
we take in preparing for our own confessions. It helps us to move forward
-- to grow and to see what it is we are working with. A fundamental beginning.
Spirituality
is unlimited
One of the things
that profoundly influenced me and caused me to learn more about what it meant
to be spiritual was my early involvement in the 12-Step Program. As a professional,
I have been in the alcoholism field for 15 years. Alcoholism, like other serious
illnesses, confronts us with looking at our total existence. Those caught
in its grips ask a lot of questions. "Why" is probably the most
often asked. It asks us to look at ourselves, and it tests the limits of our
faith. One of the things that is clear to me in the "recovering community"
is that the nature of spirituality is seen as unlimited in its scope and breadth.
Perhaps it is not stated in those terms, but it is clearly evident. Spirituality
is at the same time very clear and yet very obscure, it is always present
and yet imperceptible. Sometimes it is taken for granted, yet without it,
we are left with a hollow. Spirituality is a paradox. The AA Program echoes
some similarities. (See in the appendix an excerpt from the chapter in the
Alcoholic's Anonymous, Big Book, Second Edition, "The Professor and the
Paradox.")
Hope
The magnitude that
one's spiritual life plays in the recovery from alcoholism is hard to measure.
Yet without it, recovery is often no more than just putting the cork in the
bottle with little lasting effect. There is no cure for alcoholism, but the
disease is treatable. There is hope. A "spiritual awakening" as
suggested in the 12th step of Alcoholics Anonymous takes time.
The most hopeful
message that can be given is that our Lord is continually present whether
you are the alcoholic or a person concerned about him or her. Restructuring
lives is not an easy job, but can start as easily as it did in the beginning
of AA with one alcoholic sitting with another alcoholic over a cup of coffee
and talking.
Accepting alcoholism
as a disease may not be that easy. Accepting another human being with a serious
problem who needs help may be less difficult. We are asked to love others
as we love ourselves and do unto others as we would have them do unto us.
We are asked to love God. The Bible explains it very simply and clearly.
Suggestions
for the Priest and the parish community
